I’ve struggled with my weight for years and its never been something I’ve liked to talk about, so writing this and opening up about it is hard for me, but here we go. Lets be honest I have never been the girl with flat abs, I haven’t had flat abs since I was like six and I might never have flat abs. I have learned to accept that. I started gaining weight in elementary school and I never really tried to lose weight until my senior year in high school. Thats when I lost 40 lbs and was finally at my goal weight 125. I practically starved myself and lived at the gym, if I couldn’t go to the gym I’d spend hours yes HOURS on the treadmill at home. Even at the weight then I still didn’t have flat abs and still hated my body.
I graduated in 2011 so excuse the quality of the picture. After graduating I thought I had met my soulmate, in all reality it was just a toxic relationship which led to weight gain. After we finally ended things for good in 2013 thats where it got out of control and I became an emotional eater and for the first time in my life I was over 200 lbs. In 2017 I had finally had enough of myself and ended up losing 58 lbs. This time I just ate less and lived in the gym. I would sometimes even go twice in one day, but I was finally starting to love myself.
After losing that weight I still was nowhere near where I wanted to be, thats when I discovered I was pregnant. Once again I became an emotional eater, all I did was eat, literally for nine months. I had gained 50 lbs in that 9 months. I remember after having Jax I thought to myself “I’m never gonna get my body back” I knew I had to do something so I started a typical “diet” I lost about 30 lbs on this “diet” but I also was nursing Jax so I feel a lot of my weightless had to do with that. When Jax was three months old I found out his dad had been cheating on me with his ex girlfriend the whole time I was pregnant and even after Jax was born. I was literally devastated, I told myself this time I’m not going to eat my feelings I’m gonna prove to myself that I am strong and I’m going to get this weight off for good this time. I am so happy to report that Ive lost another 36 lbs since then and Im feeling better than ever. Thanks to Keto coffee, keto dieting, and pilates.
I still have about 10 more lbs to lose to get me to that goal weight, but I know I can get there and hey who knows I might Just get those flat abs after all! 🙂